How to Prepare for this Life Altering Choice

Those who have never experienced an abusive relationship will never had to answer the question, "Why did you stay?"  They will never understand the challenges that come from taking back control, from leaving the financial security, from giving up the dream of a better future.  For some, it was safer to stay because at least then, worrying about children visiting an abusive parent without the other parent able to act as protector is incredibly scary.  

Still, at some point, actions must be taken to get out...safely.  

Pack a ditch bag.

• Be sure to pack all important documents (birth certificates, passports, insurance information, social security cards, banking information, marriage certificate, copy of driver's license...)
• For future paperwork, you may even want a copy of his driver's license, the license plates, and pictures of him (I had to provide pictures once during a hospital stay for security so they could recognize him on sight.)
• For those with children with special medical needs, be sure to include spare supplies.  I took to driving around with a ten day supply of all her medical needs.  (bags, gauze, tape, food, spare feeding tube, extra cord to her pump...you name it)
• Clothes.  Just a few outfits will suffice.  
• Cash.  Have at least $75.  That's gas and a cheap hotel...maybe a few meals from a dollar menu.  (I can give you plenty of ideas for how to raise that cash in tomorrow's post.)
• Spare phone charger.  (enough said...)
• List of all phone numbers you may need in an emergency.  (At one point, my phone was a brick.  Having access to the numbers I needed meant that I wasn't crippled.)

Proof.  Have it.  Keep it safe. Use it.

• Pictures speak 1000 words, especially in court.  I created an album on my phone labeled 'Proof.'  When lawyers needed pictures, or police, or Victim's Assistance, I had them at the ready to share.
• I also had screen shots of text messages, and his computer activity.  
• Keep a list of any and all incidents, along with witnesses.  Mine...was a journal.  Having accurate details and dates made a huge impact on my credibility.
• Receipts.  I have them.  Tons.  

Feel free to add to this list, note anything I have forgotten or may have overlooked.  Let this be a jumping off point, a first step to planning a safe departure.  

What else would you need to leave?